Decoding: Andy Murray

To understand how Andy Murray got into tennis and how he stuck at it long and hard enough to become one of the best in the world, you have to understand Andy’s family, particularly his mother—Judy Murray.

Judy maintains that she was no tiger-mum, forcing her boys into a tennis career, but nonetheless it’s easy to see her influence in the career choice of her two boys.

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Judy Murray // Knowing the Score: My family and our tennis story

Judy Murray is best known as the mother of mother of grand slam champions Andy Murray and Jamie Murray. In this revealing account of her story she tells of her own journey in tennis from the love of the sport that her parents instilled in her to passing that down to her own two boys and the difficulties they faced on the road to becoming two of the best players in the world.

Mindset: Changing the way you think to fulfil your potential

Summary: The fixed mindset believes that intelligence and talent are fixed attributes endowed at birth. The growth mindset believes that intelligence and talent are not fixed attributes but are developed through effort and perseverance. Praising someone’s (especially a child’s) achievement by saying they are smart, gifted or talented primes them into the fixed mindset— making them afraid of failure, less likely to seek help when they need it and less likely to take on more challenging goals for fear of not appearing smart, gifted or talented. Praising their effort and hard work however shifts the focus to the process taken to reach their goal and therefore helps them put more value on the learning process and growth. The growth mindset embraces challenges and loves the process of learning that leads to successful outcomes.

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Decisions

Life is made up of a series of decisions. Small and big, some made every second you are awake and others more periodically.

Each decision moves you closer to something and away from something else.

Where you are today is the outcome of decisions made yesterday; and where you will be tomorrow depends on decisions you are making today.

Some are big, others are small. Some are critical, others less so. All are moving you closer to something and further away from something else.

All are making up the story of your life; they are creating your new normal.

Influence through empathy

People need to know that you care before they will care what you know.

When dealing with people, try to hear them first and understand where they’re coming from and what’s important to them.

To empathize is to put yourself in another’s feelings; see what they see and feel what they feel.

When someone raises a concern or shares an experience with you, try not to invalidate it by your response or quickly offering solutions.

If you lead people you often need them to “come with you” somewhere in order to realize some vision that you collectively share. For people to “come with you” they need to know that they can trust you and that you understand things from their point of view and that you see the validity and importance of that point of view.

One way to do that is to put yourself in their feelings and try to understand things from their point of view. Once they see that you “get it” they will be more ready to go with you wherever you need them to go.